Thursday, April 28, 2005

I'm so swell

Well, new pregancy symptom.....I am puffy like the pilsbury dough tight, rings cutting off circulation kind of thing.....bummer. Anyway, tonight we are hosting our weekly dinner party and so I am just sort of watching all my beloved friends drink.....longing for a taste, but don't want to get the babe drunk.

Getting ready to go to Idaho for the weekend, should be a fun time besides the 6 hour drive in my beetle. Anything for a couple days off work I guess! Anyway, think I will drag my puffy ass back to the party, much love......

Wednesday, April 27, 2005

Can I back out of this whole deal?

Well, today went pretty well, aside from a shitty day at the office. Babe is kind of squirmy tonight so I think I will take a hot shower and then lay down and enjoy her for awhile. Had a great evening, went and ate a fabulous dinner and took the dog for a walk, it was such lovely weather.

I am still wrestling with my feelings about all of the changes in my life. I mean, giving up so much freedom for a person I have never met. I am lucky that I don't have to give up all of my favorite things, but this whole experience has made me realize what an incredibly selfish person I can be. I mean, I don't want to be kept up all night, for anyone. I miss staying up late and partying with my friends. I guess I just wish I were'nt the first to experience this out of my tight group of friends. They just don't really get it.

For example, one of my friends is getting married 9/3 and I am the matron of honor. She actually thinks that I am going to throw her a bachelorette party a week after I have the a bar...and stay the night in a hotel. All I could do was say ummmm, can I umm, bring my baby you insano!? She wasn't trying to be rude, she just doesn't get it.

Sunday, April 24, 2005

Feeling productive....sort of

So yesterday I made the first attempt in a long time to work on my career and do something that doesn't involve laying around in bed. I took the Foreign Service Written Exam. For those of you who don't know about the Foreign Service, it is the US State depts. branch that takes a few (very few) folks and sets them loose in other countries as diplomats (to run consulates etc.) The first step is taking the written exam (I think 35,000 took the test yesterday) and then a few pass, take an oral exam where barely anyone passes and then they offer about 250 folks their dream jobs.

I'm not sure what my facination with living abroad is. I loved living in Mexico so much I guess it has become a lifelong goal for me. I am so lucky that David feels the same way and really would love to move anywhere I go. The weird thing is that in the U.S. I think that Portland really is the best place for us, if I were to move, it would have to be somewhere Spanish speaking and warm. Something about the pace of life in latin countries really turns me on. Anyway, after the baby is born and we have used up our FMLA I think I will start looking more seriously.

The babe is doing well, I mean, she's still in there. That's a good thing. I did some research on preemies born at 25 weeks and the outcomes are not good. She might live, but not have the kind of life I dream of for my little chiquita. So, she will just have to stay in at least another 10-15 weeks to cook. I am getting bigger, but I still don't think I am showing yet. Weight gain is at 14 lbs. which I might bring up :( due to the most shameful craving I have had yet. I want a donut more than I can explain. I am fighting it, but don't know how strong I can be......will keep you posted!

Wednesday, April 20, 2005

Decieving no one but myself

So I have a major problem linking my pregnant self to the rest of me. I seem to be under the impression that I can hide my belly under big clothes and be icognito whenever I feel like it so as to avoid the stares and belly rubs that have become part of the deal. Today I thought that I fit into the "people will just think I am overweight" style of dress and I was totally foiled!! People still knew! Ahhh, the days that I was longing to show! And even stranger is my desire to hide it!! I think that I have officially lost it.

The great thing about being 25 weeks pregnant is even though I dont' exactly feel good, I often forget that I am pregnant and start to think about other important stuff such as, oh, my job lets say. I mean, I actually get work done sometimes!! Woo hoo, I can't believe it myself :)

Tuesday, April 19, 2005

Plans in motion

Well, things went well at work today. Since DH and I work for the same company, the maternity leave plans are a bit more complicated than for most folks. I am so excited because they are going to let us alternate our leave. I will be off for 8 straight weeks, then back to work 2 days a week, DH will work 3 days a week and we can keep it up till the babe is almost 7 months old! I am so excited! The thought of leaving the little bundle with a stranger gives me the willies so at least we can prolong it until we have a good sense of what we are doing and have had time to get aquainted with each other. Life is good.

Monday, April 18, 2005

It must suck to be married to me....

So I am off work today because I have fallen deathly ill with some sort of cruel cold. DH took the day off to get stuff done around the house and the poor guy has been working so hard to get our new sleep number bed put together that I demanded he purchase so I can get a decent night's sleep (it's for the baby:) that he is rushing and accidentally ripped it. I should mention that he is putting together the bed, cooking lunch, washing laundry and babying me. I feel terrible because I am just lying around like 3rd base. Poor guy, I really don't deserve him. I think he might be getting used to my helplessness, after all, I have pretty much done nothing but go to work and sleep since December. It really must suck to be married to me!

Here I go!

So after enjoying so many people's blogs and identifying with them so thoroughly, I thought I would start my own. What an adventure this babymaking business has turned into. I am 24 weeks along with a baby girl named Goldie. So far most everyone hates the name except us, but hey, it's a family name and whoever doesn't like it can haul her around inside of them for 9 months while they think of a better name and I will be busy eating whatever I want without fear of mercury deposits, heartburn, or puking it up!